Tom Foolery

This week I gained 6 pounds......April Fool's!!! I am really down .6 pounds.

I love this holiday, always have, and my eldest son has followed suit. He woke up this morning with a pretend injury, a joke involving a fake turd, and used costumes, glasses, and funny accents to try to "trick" us. I was not as sweet.

First, I rigged the shower head to the right angle that would hit B in the face when he got in. I also set the water temperature to the coldest possible temp. I got him. This, however, was not completely original since he has used this one on me on April 1st, 2002-2005 and got me each time. I suppose the prank that would get him the most would be if I offered to make him a nutritious, yet delicious, completely balanced dinner. But, I don't think I could ever say that to him with a straight face.... so....nah! I had to think of something else of my own. So, I stole his car. I parked his jeep down the street adjacent to mine behind a large landscaping vehicle, out of eye shot. With that, I changed his radio station from the Sirius Howard Stern station to the Sirius Gay station (I couldn't find Oprah and Friends) at full volume. Finally, I left a note on the dashboard that read April Fool's and then I left to take the little one to school. I then waited for the phone call. It took a while and I wondered why. Did he call the police? Crap. Eventually, the call-- he told me that I got him for a second and then he figured it was me. The panic button on his remote helped him locate the car. Then came the warning....he went back home to take care of something. I was told to "watch your back, payback's a bitch." So far, I came home and as I opened the door with groceries in hand, at least a dozen paper towel rolls came crashing down on me. But the day is still young and I be a little scared!

"Maybe I was absent the day they taught the fruits and vegetables, but you clearly missed an entire semester of Home Ec!"
-B